I pray

Dear God,

I keep thinking about what is to come.
Life is about to get hard.
Sleep will minimal. Cries will be heart-wrenching and long-lasting. Three year olds will be rebellious. Patience will be low. Momma will be completely exhausted. Houses will be messy. Dinner will be take-out. Accomplishments will be few. Days will be long and nights will be even longer. Time alone will be rare. Quiet will be non-existent.

Lord, I am afraid. I know I will struggle.
Never, never will these fears and struggles overshadow the gratefulness I will continue to have for this gift, this blessing, you have so unexpectedly lavished us with.

Instead, I just pray. I pray you ready my mind and my heart for the changes ahead, and equip me for this journey. I pray we become even closer. Draw me to your word, Lord, not the convicting verses I so often choose, but the encouraging ones.

In my weakness, Lord, I know you will be there. I pray now that I feel your presence in those moments, and that a peace and comfort reign over my thoughts and heart.

There was a time, Lord, when I believed I didn't deserve a husband, much less even one child. You have given me even more than that.

Lord, help me keep my daily expectations low, remembering the incredible job you've provided me with. I am yours, and they were yours first too. You love them even more than I do. Help me to love them with the grace, unselfishness, and lavishness like you do.

I want to wake and be right with you first, Lord. I pray that my needs become less while my need for you is more. Give me wisdom for each day how best to serve and love these 3 men, knowing that during this season serving them, serves you.

Lord, thank you again for this...this pregnancy, this baby, this boy, a brother for my son, another son for my husband, for this family. It IS a blessing that continues to overwhelm my heart.

Lord, help me to be more like you, so that I may become a woman, wife, and mother that is pleasing in your eyes. I know I will struggle during this journey. I need you there with me, guiding me, because I can't do it myself. The struggle WILL not make me any less grateful. But, it will make me more reliant on you. I know I need you, and I will need you even more. Please help equip me now, right my heart, draw me closer, and lead me in the way. I know you will.

And, I will pray.
Thank you, Lord, for another day. Amen.